The Debates, Part I

I avoided watching the presidential debates last night, figuring that they would fit the modern mold: A joint press conference between Tweedledee and Tweedledum, with Mock Turtle asking the questions.

Judging by the post-debate buzz, I was not far off.

Senator Kerry is a competent orator, who delivers relatively contradictory nonsense with a detailed, steady-toned manner. President Bush is a horrible speaker, with a punchy, marble-mouthed style while offering relatively consistent nonsense. Was there really any doubt that Kerry would outshine Bush on presentation? There are only so many miracles a debate coach can provide. Of course, neither ever performs like President Reagan, or recalls the vision of President Franklin Roosevelt. He who wins the November 2004 election will be he who proves himself the most bearable mediocrity.

However, the transcript reveals a better match, with Bush looking surprisingly well considering he received the toughest questions (not always fair, but then again he is the only candidate with actual experience as president, so there were tougher questions to ask). Poor grammar aside, he provided more supportable arguments, even as he missed opportunities to shore them up, and his deflection on Kerry's character reads as witty, genuine, and smart. Meanwhile, Kerry says "the president made a mistake in invading Iraq," yet, when asked, "Are Americans now dying in Iraq for a mistake?" he replies with a firm No, and again moves nearer (nearer than Cambodia) to the for-invasion-even-without-WMDs position he preached as recently as late August. And two undecided voters who finally had their televisions fixed learned that John Kerry served in Vietnam! But Kerry's response to Bush's personal comments, including the senator's 'certainty' rebuttal, also makes for a classy excerpt. I would appreciate a few more exchanges like that, please.

There is a truly presidential candidate somewhere between these two. Perhaps their debates will have historical significance in the future, as an argument for mind-splicing. (Rejected brain matter might find prominent employment here.)